Godzilla: King of the Monsters

Spoiler alert.

Godzilla continues to freely roam the Earth's oceans, with impunity, and since revealing his monstrous longitude, others like have him have indeed been discovered.

Across the globe, lying dormant in slumbrous isolation, as titanic as they are formidable, yet cute and cuddly if considered in miniature.

Bewilderingly conscripted, rogue environmentalists conjure 12 Monkeys, blending in Riddick's Elementals, to unleash destructive fury.

Environmentalists and scientists less interested in freeing giant monsters to destroy half the planet, challenge them, with the aid of the American armed forces, led by Admiral David Strathairn (Admiral William Stenz).

And after Godzilla is defeated by the 3-headed alpha Monster Zero, they track him to his underwater domain, determined to accelerate his convalescence, as he rests following menacing blows.

Mothra comes to his aid in the end, but the other monsters owe allegiance to his nemesis, and it's unknown who will victoriously prevail, while Earth's best and brightest instinctively speculate.

In Monster Zero's corner lies Dr. Emma Russell (Vera Farmiga), her ex-husband (Kyle Chandler as Mark Russell) backing Godzilla.

The result is as wild as it sounds, complete with mythological vindications.

A cool prehistoric Atlantian civilization is even found deep beneath the ocean's waves, abounding with architectural wonders, depicted as Godzilla's home.

How well does Godzilla: King of the Monsters cultivate its ludicrous blockbustering?, and how successfully does it exhale ridiculousness?

It doesn't lack sincere characters, even if what takes place is incredible.

It seems as if it wants to be taken seriously, although what transpires suggests it's of no concern.

There are a lot of cool comments mixed in with chest-pounds that led me to consistently laugh then shake my head, Bradley Whitford (Dr. Rick Stanton) stealing so many scenes, Ken Watanabe (Dr. Ishiro Serizawa) and Sally Hawkins (Dr. Vivienne Graham) adding sublime depth.

But seriously, weapons of mass destruction are no laughing matter, and shouldn't be used to solve problems, and even if Godzilla thrives on radioactivity, there's always a less explosive alternative.

The monster fights are super badass even if they're interrupted much too frequently.

Kyle Chandler's too much a lot of the time.

Which is kind of perfect for a blockbuster.

With the kitsch factor so high he could have made even more of an impact.

Although that could be saved for other films.

Ramboesque films, in which he wears a bandana.

Co-starring Bradley Whitford.

If King of the Monsters had been less serious, it would have been more ridiculous, which would have been nice, but I suppose it's not a comedy, even though it's the comedic aspects of blockbusters that make them memorable.

Too much woe perhaps.

Very heavy on the woe.

The bad decisions made in response to an overwhelming unknown.

Would world leaders really make decisions that shortsighted if confronted with giant monsters hellbent on destroying one another and/or taking over the planet?

Who's to say?

Pretty crazy new Godzilla movie anyways.

A must see for Godzilla alone.

Krampus

Take heed for the information contained herewith concerns spirits of a different kind, whose purpose in regards to Christmas is to malevolently punish and ruin those who disrespect its sincere generosity, arising from the fiery depths of ancient lore to assert his rank as naughtiest, Krampus the unforgiving unleashes his supernatural wrath, the postmodern world unaware of his vengeful agenda and Saint Nicholas unable to counter his chaotic disdain, a heartfelt letter warmly written with tender loving care representative of the true spirit of Christmas is torn to pieces after its author is ritualistically humiliated, said humiliation having cauterized the mutual contempt two related families hold for one another as they attempt to bond over the holidays, in a searing transcendent sweltering condemnation, the wealthier family unimpressed with the gruff pretensions of their less affluent cousins, the less affluent cousins none to subservient to the airs of their relatives, common decency misplaced as they assemble to dine, discourses of purity belittling the times, the letter is torn and they must maintain a united front to defend their families against Krampus's rancour, Omi (Krista Stadler) having met him before, inasmuch as her warnings demand that they exercise extreme caution, lassitude sets in and Krampus's minions infiltrate freely, the Christmas spirit revitalizing their familial fervency as they boldly defend their own, but Krampus is not prone to listen once he has risen, a desperate confrontation ensuing with the festively spiritual maladroitly abandoned, as Krampus reminds them that Christmas requires thanksgiving through his harsh and gratuitous penalties, necrobatically assigned by harbingers of the ungrateful, the absurdity of it all oddly upholding pleasantries like amazement and wonder, the gross infernal exaggerations, the total and complete lack of goodwill, grotesquely generating feelings to the contrary, to the contemporary, insensitively and unconsciously underscoring virtuous contemplations of both bounty and cheer, the beautiful communal ties of the season, rejoicing through the act of gift giving, celebrating life with family and friends, to renew a sense of endearing well being, a mirthful maturation, amusing in solace and laughter.