Tuesday, September 3, 2019

Ready or Not

Ornate bedazzling conjugal prudence, quizzically steeped in risk-fuelled dilemma, substituting strategic seance for picturesque pleasures, familial fraternizing, an evening bygone, enormous wealth obtained through rash demonic recourse, bearing conditions, inextricable bounds, a friendly gathering perhaps, a meet and greet, presumed paternal pastures, pejorative precipitate, malicious discountenance, you must play by the rules, dissembled decrees, overstated maladroit discerned incumbent acrimony, bewitching flights of fancy, hidden codes, simplicity.

It could have been sundrenched and storybook, their marriage freely uplifting protest, age old yet modernly equipped, escapading nascent naivety.

A beach even.

Some ice cream.

Yet their wedded bliss is dependent upon satanic ceremonious sanctity, as humble and waylaid as it is despotic, cruel, assumed tensions with in-laws ballistically manifested, stubborn caprice immortally presumed, a game of chance as alluring as apple pie, with a slice of cheese and whipped cream and cinnamon, no preparation given to the rapturous bride, her adoring husband rather upset.

Run for it.

Deconstruct the embargo.

Grace (Samara Weaving) outwits her adversaries for some time, but in so doing Ready or Not runs into trouble, for the logical course she frenetically follows lacks character and interactivity, the question, "how do you fill a script, wherein which a newly wed must be grimly hunted down and then ritualistically sacrificed, with steady doses of thoughtful conversation?", remaining, the answer to which requires necromantic genius, and supplies more verbose discontinuities.

I think the idea was to keep most of them around to perform the sacrifice in the end, even if it could have been done with a far less complementary ensemble.

Such an approach wouldn't have made as much sense, but it would have provided more spoiled food for thought, I'm not sure how seriously horror writers have to take sense anyways, inasmuch as the genre's inherently nuts.

If they had still made it seem realistic it would have been phenomenal.

There are some great horror films that do come across as if they're real though, their horror producing much more lasting feelings of anxiety, why do I watch these films?, but it's not as if they reasonably or rationally make sense when you think about them afterward, it's more like they do a much better job of making the absurd seem plausible, as if meaninglessness were something profound.

Which Ready or Not could have been with less chase and more pace as it generates distressing alarm.

I know I wrote I don't watch horror films much anymore.

But Les Fauves made a perfect fit with my schedule.

And Ready or Not co-stars Kristian Bruun (Fitch Bradley) from Murdoch Mysteries.

He has some great lines.

I would have ended the film with the phrase, "got married."

It seemed more appropriate at the time.

Not the greatest but still above average.

It's like it has action figures in mind.

*I didn't even mean to rhyme all that.

**Damn.

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